The bloating is unbelievable, I blew up like a balloon almost straight away, and not in the neat tight mini bump way that I had seen in images online and in magazines. But in a watery, wobbly way that made all my clothes very tight.
I actually felt quite sexy, despite the bloat. I imagined that as soon as I was pregnant I wouldn’t be interested in any of that shenanigans, actually it was quite the opposite.
My mind turned to mush. I had heard the phrase “baby brain” but nothing could prepare me for the ridiculously small amount of information that I retained. It did prove a little embarrassing at work, especially when entire meetings that I had held I re-scheduled because I had forgotten that I had them in the first place.
My relationship with my husband has flourished. I saw a different side to him, he is always so laid back and calm, but I saw a little protectiveness from him that I found really attractive. He is so kind and caring, being in this new situation together reiterated how wonderful he is.
I got scared that I would be lonely. This is something that still follows me around. My family live 100 miles away, my role in my friendship group is the hostess with all the wine, who stays up until the sun rises and never says no to a party. I was worried that my friends wouldn’t have a place for me being wobbly and sober. I still worry about this. However I do now accept that the people who really love me won’t go anywhere. I have removed the pressure I put on myself to keep being all things and it does feel better.
It is really hard to keep it a secret and 12 weeks feels like a lifetime. I did tell a few of my closest family, friends and colleges early on. I needed their support, and, heaven forbid something went wrong I would need it then too.
The exhaustion was real.
I thought I would worry about money a lot, but all of a sudden it didn’t matter. I now have this c’est la vie attitude towards it. Maybe that’s stupid, but I am sure we will work it out, like millions of families before us have.
How little contact you have with medical professionals. You don’t need it, but in my mind the biggest thing ever has just happened to me, and you see someone once between conception and 12 weeks. I don’t know what I expected but I did feel quite at sea without the reassurance that everything was OK.
People get REALLY excited. I had friends download pregnancy apps and my Mum post me three Panettones as I mentioned to her once in passing I liked it. It is a really nice feeling that your nearest and dearest care so much.